Food Poisoned by Grandma’s Turkey

This post on a local attorneys blog was funny to me. I thought it was a great way to inject humor into something serious and possibly get some traction on guest posts.

No one said anything about it, but we knew she did it. No big deal. We all forget from time to time. And besides, leaving the turkey out all night wasn’t that bad, right?

Read the rest –

Rand Fishkin’s Wife Shares Funny Spam Request Responses

This is just plain funny!

You might get some good ideas on how to respond to spam. Although, I really don’t advise replying because that just let’s them know there is a warm body at the spammed email.

Notice to Appear

If I ever got a real Notice to Appear (in court) in my email I’d be in trouble. I must get seven SPAM emails a day with that title.

Don’t Procrastinate


Last night I got home from work, looked at the front lawn and thought this has to be mowed. I was tired and rarely do I feel like mowing the lawn. It was a beautiful, not too hot, day in the South. So it was a rare, perfect weather day for lawn mowing. I needed to grill for dinner so I figured I’ll mow afterwards.

I got done with dinner and was content with a full stomach. The lawn mowing can wait a day, can’t it? Knowing rain was in the forecast I checked the weather to see when it was to arrive. No rain until latter tomorrow night, great. The mowing can wait until tomorrow for sure.

I woke up this morning to rain. Argg. I should have mowed right away and had it behind me. I know better.

Most of the time when there is a job to get done, now is the best time. In school I used to put of projects until the last minute. I did get to mess around but in the end I paid the price with worry, stress, and many times inferior product. When I went in to the workforce I changed my ways for the better.

In my work years I’ve been a get-it-done now kind of guy. My wife is even careful when she asks me to do something while I’m relaxing for fear I’ll jump up right then and do it. She says to me, I didn’t mean right now, it can wait. My response, there is no time like the present. The reality is that I’ll just forget if I don’t do it right away. But, it gets done, and leaves me time for problems.

Don’t procrastinate. It’s not worth it. You get the job done, feel good about it, and have time to make adjustments or edits. Best of all, you’ll head off anyone or anything raining on your parade, or lawn.

Teach Cashiers Simple Math Skills

Today I went thru the McDonald’s drive thru for a meal. The total came to $5.88. While waiting in line I should have contemplated why 2 cheese burgers, fries, and a diet coke cost so much or even why am I eating this. Instead, I scrounged around for 38 cents of loose change.  I figure if I can exchange 3 dimes, a nickel, and 3 pennies for 2 quarters I’ve simplified my life in some way; at the very least I’ve removed some clutter and useless changed from the car. When I pulled up to the window and handed the middle aged lady my twenty and change things went south.

Once I handed the cashier my $20.38 she immediately thrust it back into my hands and said, “it’s five eighty eight NOT thirty eight.”  I was kind of in shock for a moment and just took my change back and then the extra change from my twenty. No lovely quarters.

So I was left eating bad food wondering if people have a clue how to do simple math anymore. Doesn’t the cash register do all the work for you? I want my 2 quarters!

Income Inequality Stories are Generally Stupid and Devisive

Income inequality widens in all 50 states
A new report finds that lopsided income growth is happening across the nation, but the gap between the top earners and everyone else is substantially wider in several states.–income-inequality-widens-in-all-50-states

These stories are stupid and divisive. Anybody with some statistics and math skills would know this is not the way to look at these numbers. The top 1% is a statistical outlier; basically Bill Gates, Warren Buffett, and the other 400 richest peoples income means nothing to the rest of us; they make a ton of money off of stock, interest, and other rich people income.

I think the biggest issue left out of these “stir the pot” articles is that there isn’t a fixed amount of money in the system. The rich can make all they want and the rest of us still have plenty of opportunity to make money. It’s not like they take a bunch and leave nothing for the rest.

Income distribution is a much more complicated issue than this article, or I, address. You can study this yourself and see that aside from stock option windfalls during the late-1990s, there is little evidence of a significant or sustained increase in the inequality of U.S. incomes, wages, consumption, or wealth over the past 20 years.

This article does a better job talking about it:

Really? Gold or Nothing?

When did we become a nation of Gold or nothing? The news media make second place sound like the line from Ricky Bobby, “”If you ain’t first, you’re last.” What hogwash. Making it to the Olympics is a monumental task. Receiving a medal in the Olympics is nothing short of amazing.

Last night, while comfortably and lazily lying on my couch, I thought how impressed I’d be if I had a guest over to my home that was in the Olympics. The conversation wouldn’t be about what medal they received it would be, “wow, you made it to the Olympics.” Then the conversation might proceed to, “no way, you got a bronze medal, in the Olympics, against all the best in the world.” Certainly I wouldn’t be thinking you are such a loser because you didn’t get a Gold medal.

Athletes give up a lot to simply participate. They give a lot more to make it to the Olympics. As the father of a college athlete I know about the sacrifices that are made simply to be on the team. Short Christmas breaks, no free time in the afternoon, short summers. The list goes on from there.

All of us, including the media, need to celebrate our athletes. Give them a small token of appreciation for all they’ve given up to be the best in the world. The best in the world!

Baby It’s Cold Outside

Five degrees in Alabama and my office heat is out.  Brrr. It’s 50 degrees in here. Headed home to get a space heater.

Honest Salesperson = Oxymoron

Is honest salesperson and oxymoron?

I hope not as we all spend some time selling. Some of us more than others.

I used to tell my sales force if can’t sell the customer honestly, something is wrong with the product, the company, or you. We need to figure it out, fix it, and then sell honestly. Modern sales is about building relationships and few, if any, good relationships are build on lies.

The big secret to credibility – Don’t Ever Lie…Ever


Let the Kids on the Grass

“My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, “You’re tearing up the grass.” “We’re not raising grass,” Dad would reply. “We’re raising boys.” – Harmon Killebrew

When I saw this today I thought of the times I told the kids to not play on the front grass because it would tear it up.  If you have young kids, let them play on the grass. The grass grows, the kids grow; the grass is still out there but the kids are grown and on their own.

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